May 24, 2012

“…These people with bumper stickers that say ‘We are the proud parents of an honors student at the Bratmere’s School.” You know? Or the Midvale Academy or whatever innocent-sounding name has been assigned to the indoctrination center where their child has been sent to be stripped of his individuality and turned into an obedient soul-dead conformist member of the American consumer culture. ‘Proud parents.’ What kind of empty people need to validate themselves through the achievements of their children? How’d you like to have to live with a couple of these misfits?

‘How’s that science project coming along, Justin?’

‘Fuck you Dad. You simple-minded prick. Mind your own business and pass the cheerios.’

Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: ‘We are the proud parents of a child whose self-esteem is sufficient enough that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.’ Or ‘We are the proud parents of a child who has resisted his teacher’s attempts to break his spirit and bend him to the will of his corporate masters.’ Just for a change you know?'”

George Carlin


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